Well, Merv had lost several kilos (so he thought by the way his privates got an airing when his shorts felt loose) by walking around Pattaya every day. Hence he told me (on our afternoon beer session) it was worth a quick visit to Big C, and the electronic weighing machine in the walkway to the toilets.
So he put his one baht coin (2p) in the slot and stepped on the stand. The machine registered his presence, but at that moment another Farang stepped on beside him.
Merv's reaction was stoic. Didn't say a word - just eased himself off , and exited stage left - sharpish.
He gave me one of those looks with eyebrows raised - you know - what the ????
I said, 'Did you lose weight?'
He replied, ' F*** knows!'